I am guessing that interest in my updates may have diminished because it has come to my attention that (against all odds) I have neglected to mention much of anything about the cuisine here in Malawi.
Allow me to remedy that situation in a shameless plug to boost approval ratings.
Though considerably less extreme (on the nauseating scale) than Mongolia, Malawi definitely has something special to offer the palate. We rely on what I like to call the Big Five: cabbage, okra, tomatoes (I'm cursed), pumpkin leaves (I'm still waiting for the actual pumpkins to make an appearance), and onion. We eat these on a revolving basis - depending on availability - with rice, always rice. Rice is, it should be noted, our bourgeoisie replacement for the local staple food nsima (pronounced with a swallowed 'n' + 'sima'). Basically like congealed cream-of-wheat served in palm-size "pats" and made from maize flour. Odorless, tasteless, colorless, and can't be traced.
A Malawian riddle (conveniently included in the English curriculum):
Q: What is a mountain that you climb with your hands?
A: Nsima.
A popular Malawian saying:
"That exam was simple, like eating nsima!"
It is suspected here that the world revolves, not around the sun, but around a giant pat of molten nsima. That the heart is not an organ, but a pulsating pat of nsima pumping our life blood. In fact, its possible that our veins don't hold blood, but an ever running river of nsima.
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